Winner and Loser...

"An individual sadly and badly injures himself by calling himself
a winner, when in fact he is a loser. We have our ideas and opinions
as to what constitutes winning and according to those false standards
and values think thereby that it is legitimate to call ourselves a
winner. For example, you have certain prides, certain vanities and
you have certain accomplishments and possessions in your home, in
your garage, in your bank. These - to a sleeping human being - are
called evidences of having won, of having succeeded at what you
were supposed to succeed at as a human being.

Very seldom does a man or a woman challenge this disastrous
self-concept of what it means to win.

If you even need to win anything, including the argument,
including getting your way, the very fact that you have a
compulsive need to win means that there is a loser there
trying to win, which means that the winning must be losing
in actuality.

It is so essential for you to listen to yourself talk to
yourself and catch instantly all such definitions of you
being right, being the winner."

from a talk given 4/5/1986
Vernon Howard's Higher World - MP3 CD Volume 3, talk 54.......Vernon Howard