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' Roles in relationships '...


We often play roles for each other based on our conditioning including the role of mother, father, sister, brother, wife, husband, lover, customer, salesman, convenience store clerk, doctor, policeman, politician, secretary, friend, preacher, teacher, spiritual seeker, Christian, Buddhist, and Hindu. The list is endless. We are conditioned to believe that we are whatever role we are playing. We are not roles. Roles are rigid patterns of thought. We are much more vibrantly alive than some pattern of thought.

When you are living life through a role, you are attached to the past, to some idea you learned or modeled from the past regarding how to act within a given situation or relationship. Actions are taken according to that conditioned image—that role.

The mind fears that if it does not conform to a certain pattern, role, or image, it will not know how to act or it will not be able to control a particular situation. But the truth is you do not have control. There is no “you” to have control. The “you” is a story of separation fueled by a contraction in the body and mind. The “you” is the role.

There is a presence here, right now, that is not playing any role. It simply is. In recognizing that your real identity is this presence, the playing of roles is seen to be unnecessary.




-Kiloby, Scott. Reflections of the One Life: Daily Pointers to Enlightenment

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